It's happening. I knew it would. It was only a matter of time.I'm turning into my father - Shouty Grandad.
I was sitting in the shuttle bus this afternoon, waiting for it to take me to my car at the Park and Ride when I saw a visitor to the hospital. She was sitting with 2 friends on a wall outside. she lit up a cigarette and after a short conversation with one friend, turned round and threw the empty cigarette packet into the shrubbery behind her.
Can you feel it? That's my blood on 'simmer'. I now have a choice.
Do I a. ignore the act of litter, make my way to my car and fester with anger and injustice all afternoon? or b. go over to the woman and point out that not only is she smoking in a health centre but making the place dirty with the garbage from her filthy habit (you can tell I'm an ex-smoker, right?).
b. it is
I get out of the bus, walk over, say, "Excuse me" lean in between 2 of the friends and pick up the empty packet, wave it under her nose and say, "I think you dropped this." Before she can take it and put it in her bag, I snatch it away and walk 6 steps - yes 6 steps to the nearby bin and deposit the offending carton in. As I walk back past the group, the woman gripes, "Why has everyone got it in for me?". I turn back toward her - my heart is palpitating hard, my voice shrill (I don't 'do' confrontation, I become too stressed - it's a stress and depression thing from way back) - I say, "You should take some responsibility for your actions instead of feeling sorry for yourself. You come to my place of work and chuck your garbage around AND smoke in a HOSPITAL - it's about time someone pointed out how anti-social you are." Her reply was a classic, "You don't have to tell me about smoking," pointing at one friend, "this is my mother and she's got cancer." I can hardly believe her rubbish reply. "Then you of all people should know why you shouldn't smoke, especially in a hospital where there are sick people."
"Where does it say I can't smoke?" says she - nailing her argument coffin shut. Even her friends raised their eyes to the heavens.
"EVERYWHERE" said I. Turned on my heel and got back on the bus.
The real point to the story is that it took me about an hour to calm down, slow my breathing and heart rate. I need some help to sort out my confrontation anxiety - either that or a blindfold!
